Jumat, 04 Juni 2010

Another reason to dislike Stalin:

Pukh. (No, I’m not swearing at you in Russian.)

Recently in the land of mad (Russia) a strange mystical dust-like material has been falling from the sky. At first I just thought it was blossom from the trees near my flat, but then I began to realise it was EVERYWHERE. Literally everywhere… outside my flat, in the parks, near Red Square, at my school etc etc. Moscow is once again covered in a white sheet… but this time it’s not snow, it’s pukh.
Here's a picture of my street this morning:

So what is pukh and why is it falling on Moscow? Well, many years ago when Stalin was in power he decided that Moscow wasn’t green enough so he planted (well he himself probably didn’t plant them!) hundreds and hundreds of poplar trees, not realising that poplar’s have sex lives – every female needs a male. If you plant too many females the males can’t fertilise them… which is what he did. Another brilliant plan from Stalin. So now every June the female poplars release unfertilised seeds: pukh.

It seriously looks and feels like it’s snowing again. And it gets everywhere. EVERYWHERE. My ears, my mouth, my nose, my eyes: I have to walk everywhere with my head down because if I look up the pukh gets stuck to my mascara and I’m temporarily blinded. My skin has erupted into spots because of the irritation from it. So right now I’m looking very sexy… spotty, blind and coughing. Hawt.

Worst of all, there is nowhere to escape the pukh! Open a window and the room will immediately turn into a wonderland of flying pukh. As at the moment it is around 25ºC everyday we have a choice: boil to death inside or put up with the pukh.

I hope it pukh’s off soon. (Ooooh apologises for that terrible, terrible joke.)

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