I’ve been caught in the rain without an umbrella.

I’ve just got in from having to run the 20 minute walk home as it was THROWING it down with rain. Boo. I think this is also a metaphor for how I’m feeling right now. It’s gonna be difficult for me to write this blog without sounding like I’m moaning, but I’ll try…

Basically I’m feeling a bit down and useless at the moment. I almost feel bad for not having a good time. I feel like because I’m on my year abroad I should be having fun all the time AND I really hate the thought that other people are having more fun than me in other places so I feel like to justify me being here I should be happy happy happy all the time. But I am only human. And sometimes human’s just feel a bit ‘meh’.

I know why I feel like this though, it’s because uni term has now started in the UK. Facebook is full of albums called ‘Freshers in 3rd year!’, ‘Back to uni!’ and ‘Everyone in the UK is having more fun than Sarah because we can speak the same language as the country we’re in’. OK. I may have made up the last one. I keep getting invited to parties in Birmingham. I keep getting invited to Birmingham uni events. And I hate to say it but... I MISS BIRMINGHAM. I never thought I’d say that. It took me two years to get settled there! And the worst part is that when I go back next year it’s all going to be different because none of my friends will be there. Sigh. I think I expected Birmingham uni to just skip this year as I wasn’t going to be present. Clearly ridiculous, but this is my head.

I’m also super tired because I haven’t been sleeping well at all recently. The genius that designed this bed decided to put a bar down the middle of it. No position is comfy. And everything just seems bad when you are awake in the middle of the night – I turn into a crazed, emotional girl.

And then today it rained and rained and RAINED. So now I’m tired and soaking. GAH.

OK moan over. Here’s what I’ve been up to the past couple of days:

I met up with Alex and Jacqui, the directors of Love Russia over the weekend on one of their trips to Moscow. We visited a centre that teaches young people with learning disability’s vocational skills in order to help them get jobs. The director of the centre was a great man who provided us with cake, sandwiches and of course, vodka. The work that they do there is really great. I chatted with some of the young people and they told me how much they loved it there.

On Friday night we went to a concert put on by Emma Marie, who lives here in Moscow running a music programme in a young people’s prison. The work she is doing is awesome. She’s so hard working! She’s lived in Russia two years now and her Russian is beyond amazing. I hope I manage to get that good too!

I want to investigate other charities in Moscow as well. I found a long list of all the charities here and spent ages last night emailing them all. I had no replies today though, a little disheartening. I really want to get involved with some projects in Moscow but I’m finding it really difficult to do.

After the huge moan at the beginning of this blog I have to say I am OK though! I’m really enjoying school here! In the UK I thought nothing of skipping classes if I hadn’t had enough sleep but here I’m still going in even after only 3 hours sleep. My Russian is getting so much better!

My mum said on the phone the other day that she thought I sounded a lot happier here than I ever did in Birmingham, and Alex and Jacqui said the same when they visited Moscow over the weekend. I thought this was really weird because I felt like I was actually missing the UK tons and just trying to fool everyone (badly – I’m a rubbish liar) that I was having so much fun... blahblahblah. But then I got thinking about it and when I’m in Russia it does just feel right. I can’t explain it because obviously I have days (like today) when I am ready to run to the airport and fly straight back home and forget I ever went to Russia, never mind studied the language. But something is keeping me here. I just want to know what it is!!! I want to get involved with something here and feel like I’m making a difference. That is after all the whole reason I decided to study Russian.

So this was a bit of a moan but I’ll leave you with this positive. I’m off to watch a lot of X Factor on youtube. I can’t let X Factor go yet. I’m not ready to be that Russian.

A couple of thoughts about the Metro, Potatoes, Sushi and Fashion.

So on Sunday we went to the Space museum with our new Russian friends. It was so much fun! We had a guide show us round the museum and even though I didn’t understand much (it was obviously in Russian) it was still pretty interesting. Then we went to a café and the fair with them. The space museum is next to this huge park with a fair. It is COOL. I really enjoyed it and every time I actually manage to pull off a whole conversation of Russian I am filled with a warm fuzzy feeling.

We haven’t done anything major this week. Just school, school and more school. My Russian is definitely getting better. I need to do more reading through what we’ve done in class though so I don’t forget it immediately.

As I haven’t really got anything interesting to tell I thought I’d share some thoughts of Moscow instead:

Thought no 1: The Metro.
I have a crush on the metro. It’s just such an AMAZING idea. I can get anywhere so fast. The Moscow metro is so much nicer than the London underground as well. Every station is so amazingly decorated. And the escalators literally go on forever. I keep being late meeting people because I forget that the time I arrive at a station is not the same time as the time I will be out of the station, I have to remember to add the 10 minutes necessary for standing on an escalator.
I love the way Russians act on the metro. Literally everyday I see people jump over the barriers to travel for free (unlike in London you don’t have to show your card when you get OFF the metro as well – once you’re in you’re in – I think this must make it easier for people to jump the barriers and RUN in) and the security guards never really seem to do anything. I wouldn’t recommend doing this though!
Also I love the way that people don’t have the whole ‘personal space’ thing that we have in the UK. Everyone will just crush each other onto the metro. Many times I have ended up with my face way too close to a complete stranger. People don’t think anything of pushing, shoving and throwing people out of the way when they need to get somewhere fast. At first I found it mega rude but I have to say now I join in and have pushed in front of people on many occasions. Queuing is a thing of the past for me – now, just like the Muscovites I think, ‘whoever pushes the hardest will get to the front first’.
I am still perfecting my Metro Face. I can’t seem to stop a slight smile when I catch someone else’s eye. The Russians must think I am mad.

Thought no 2: Potatoes and Sushi.
Russian potatoes are SO GOOD. I can literally not describe how tasty they are. I don’t know why they are so superior to potatoes in the UK, but they just are.
Continuing on the food theme: I have found there are lots of sushi restaurants in Moscow and they’re all pretty cheap. I had forgotten how good sushi is. I am literally addicted to it. Can’t stop eating it.

Thought no 3: Fashion.
Russian girls wear the kind of clothes to work that I would wear for a night out. I found this massively weird (and felt like I was always very underdressed) so asked Vika about it. She said that everyone wears things like that so they can go straight from work to their night out – whether it be in a restaurant, bar or club, without having to go home. Makes sense really. I don’t fancy walking round in heels all day though - I can’t even cope with them on nights out (always take flats in your bag.)

And finally…

Obviously I make mistakes in Russian, sometimes it’s embarrassing but sometimes it’s hilarious, here are two funny examples:

In the post office I asked for a carrot instead of a stamp, carrot = markov, stamp = marka. The woman wasn’t impressed but me and my friend found it hilarious.

At home I asked Vika if we had a fly in the cupboard. I wanted to know if we had flour in the cupboard, fly = mykha, flour = myka. We literally could not stop laughing.

A souper week in which I learnt: Don’t go near the dogs!

This week we started our actual lessons with a proper timetable and everything! I have SO MUCH grammar. I hate grammar; in fact I couldn’t spell it for the whole of first year (grammEr) as I hated it so much – although maybe this shows how much I need it. I admit my Russian grammar is terrible… but so is my English! I know it’s going to do so much good but at the moment I wish we didn’t have so much! We’ve also started translating from English to Russian. It’s a lot harder than from Russian to English as you have to know every word and the grammar for it. It’s really difficult but I can tell I’m being pushed so it will probably do me good!

In one of our lessons this week we went to a café with some Russian students from a university nearby and had to ‘get to know them’. It felt like we were being sent on a blind date by our teachers. But it ended up being really fun and we managed to have a conversation with them for over an hour. We’re meeting up with them again tomorrow so hopefully this will give us our longed for Russian friends!

Yesterday we had to go to the British embassy for a ‘Health and Security Briefing’. Two weeks into our time here. Surely if this is so necessary we needed this when we arrived? As we expected it was completely ridiculous and they basically told us everything we already knew, ie. ‘Don’t get into an unlicensed taxi that already has people in it. Don’t get drunk and talk to the police. Don’t walk alone at night in dodgy places.’ Who would be stupid enough to do these? Sometimes I feel like we’re being treated like we’re idiots. We had a health talk about things like the safety of drinking tap water and stuff. Hilariously after all these talks the biggest information we found out was DON’T GO NEAR DOGS. Apparently dogs are our biggest enemy because if they bite us we will surely die. Well. They didn’t exactly say that but they did keep going on and on about rabies. I keep seeing stray dogs now and fearing for my life.

Some of the people in my group loved the British embassy a bit too much! I know lots of people are missing Britain but I feel like we should be trying to enjoy our time here as much as possible and enjoying what an amazing privilege we have to live in Russia for a whole year, not think about everything that we miss from Britain! I have to admit right now I want some TOAST more than anything in the world (no toaster, grill doesn’t work) but I have learnt to let it go and instead enjoy my dill covered bread.

The best part of this week has been that I have found a church that I LOVE. My friend travelled around Russia a lot last year and he told me about this church in Moscow. I looked it up on the internet and went to check it out this evening (they have services on Saturday evenings as well as Sunday mornings and afternoons – this is perfect because I can decide whether I want to get up early or have a lie in on Sundays!). So me and Anabelle went armed with only a small map. We managed to find the street and I expected it to be quite small so we looked in all the smaller buildings around where it should be but couldn’t find it. I prayed. We turned round and I saw a huge building that we’d completely ignored thinking that couldn’t be it. We walked up to it. There was a cross inside. Potentially we had found it. We walked into a small dark room and my heart sank thinking this couldn’t be it then a man told us to go through and we walked into a massive church service in a modern church building. I am continually learning in Russia not to judge a book by its cover! The service was exactly what I wanted from a church. We sang songs in Russian but with the English words on the screen as well. I understood some of the sermon (apparently some of the services are translated into English so maybe I’ll go to one of them). We sang ‘How Great is our God’ in Russian and I just thought, ‘Wow, I’m singing praise to God in a different language. He really IS great.’ The church reminded me of Community Church in Huddersfield and St John’s in Birmingham. It was really big but I think that’s what I want from a church in Russia. Normally I prefer small churches but I think I need a big one so I can take my time understanding everything. I felt so at peace and I think I cried through the whole service (happy tears!). It was Anabelle’s first time at church so I had to explain that I was crying because I felt so at home… not because I hated it! God is reminding me again that he IS everywhere.

On a final note I made some TASTY soup this week… fry 1 onion, add 2 chopped potatoes, 1 chopped carrot and a tablespoon of flour, add water and stock, boil, leave to simmer for 20 mins, add chopped cucumber and spring onion, stir, serve. SOUPER.

Events of the week: The return of the Landlady and the VIP night out.

Another eventful week. The first big event was the return of the Landlady from her holiday. After being so worried about meeting her it was, of course, fine. She is however completely mental. I LOVE her. Lol. Basically I got home on Thursday and started to unlock the door and she suddenly pulled it open and shouted 'SARAH?' in my face. I was like... 'da?!' Then she pulled me into the house and said 'Have you listened to my cd's?' (She's a Christian singer) I was like 'errrrrrrr yessss' (minor lie) So she said, 'ah we will listen to it and sing' then marched me to the kitchen and made me sing along to her cd with her. Total madness. Then she took me round the house showing me everything - even though I've been here a week and so have managed to locate the toilet myself. She also keeps barging into my room without knocking and just chattering at me then leaving. Crazy. She’s really nice though, just very VERY chatty. A lot of the time I’m not sure whether she is actually talking to me or just chattering to herself! I do however keep getting my own private concerts from her in our kitchen. I think these may get less delightful over time…

The other main event of this week was our first night out sampling the delights of Moscow’s clubbing scene. We got off to a bad start when the first place we went to refused to let us in for no reason (they use face control in the clubs in Moscow – ie. If you’re not a supermodel you’re not getting in). So after a ridiculous run to the metro before it shut for the night we went to a different club called Solyanka that actually let us in! Woop! It was very cool – more of a cocktails rather than a Malibu and coke kinda place! The music was pretty random at first but I didn’t care, I was in need of a good DANCE! But then two English guys started DJing. They played all the choons that we wanted – Black Eyed Peas, Lady Gaga, Snap (Rhythm is a dancer!). It was sooo good. I danced, danced, danced and DANCED. We got chatting to the DJ’s when they realized we were from the UK and they invited us to an after party at one of the most exclusive clubs in Moscow! After putting us on the guest list as their ‘make up artists’ we got straight in. It was crazy! Clearly all the super rich kids of Moscow were there. We were actually partying with the ‘new rich’ in Moscow! We got there at like 5am and the party carried on until past 9am, but we needed to leave then – we’d been out since 11.30pm the night before! So, exhausted, we had to walk to get the metro home. I arrived home at 10am. Just another night in Moskva…

When you did it to one of the least of these.

In Matthew 25 in the Bible it says,

Then the King will say to those on his right. ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the creation of the world. For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’
Then the righteous will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’
And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’

I’ve been thinking about this passage over the past couple of days. In Moscow there is a lot of poverty. It’s an expensive city and I think a lot of people here find it hard to be able to live here. Everyday I see people begging outside the metro, many of them holding up signs saying things like ‘Help me to buy medicine.’ ‘Help me to eat tonight.’ The most heart wrenching one so far was one held up by a girl who looked a couple of years younger than me: ‘Help me, my parents have died.’ It broke my heart.

Before I go on I want to point out that I KNOW that Moscow is not the only place with poverty. I know there are homeless people in the UK just as much as here. I know a lot of people can’t understand why I want to help people in Russia and not in the UK. That’s not the case! I want to be able to help people everywhere but I can’t save the world! To those who criticise me for working with the poor in Russia and not in the UK I challenge YOU to help those suffering in the UK.

Anyway, over the week I’ve been here I’ve been noticing these people who need help more and more and two days ago I suddenly realised that I always just walked past them. I may have noticed them but I didn’t do anything. When I see a homeless person I always think, ‘Oh I shouldn’t give them money because they’ll probably only spend it on drugs or alcohol’ or ‘I bet that sign they’re holding is a lie. They’re just trying to get my money for alcohol.’

But who am I to judge these people? How do I know they’re going to spend it on alcohol? Maybe they really do need money for medicine or food. If they were that desperate for money that they would stand outside a metro station holding a sign begging for money then they are clearly suffering.

I had been praying that God would show me how I could be of use in Moscow and two days ago when I had this realisation I then walked straight past a woman holding a sign saying ‘Help me eat tonight’ and suddenly heard ‘When you did it to one of the least of these’. I knew God wanted me to give some money to this person. But I was scared. What if giving money to the homeless was frowned upon in Russia? What if someone shouted at me for doing it? Then I looked around and noticed that there was no-one around (I was walking through a subway). It was just me and this woman. I stopped and gave her what was in my pocket, 10r (20p), she looked amazed and shouted thank you to me as I carried on walking. I didn’t want any glory for giving her that money. I wanted her to know it was from God. As I walked away I prayed and prayed and prayed that she would use that money for something she needed and not alcohol or drugs.

In the UK I have a money box that I put all my loose change in and then I give it to charity. Here I’ve started carrying it in my pocket, so I can give it to those I see who are in need. I don’t know what they are going to do with it; I can only pray that they will use it for good.

Lenin, Stalin and Marx in one day.

Yesterday has got to have been the most ridiculous day so far. After class me and three friends decided to explore around the main street in Moscow – Tverskaya ulitsa. We looked around the shops a bit and then walked down to Red Square (which is STILL shut. It’s so annoying. I’ve been in Moscow nearly a week and we’re STILL not allowed on there.) Anyway, we were wandering around Red Square and who should we see – Lenin and Stalin. No word of a lie. There are two men who dress up as Lenin and Stalin and wander around near Red Square giving speeches that Lenin and Stalin once gave and posing for pictures with tourists. Total madness. I love Russia. Then we walked on for a bit and found the statue of Marx. Lenin, Stalin and Marx in one day. A productive day.

Today we had one class then we had to go and ‘put our new skills into practise.’ We had been learning how to ask for directions and how to talk about the metro – the teachers seem to have forgotten that we have in fact been in Moscow for nearly a week and so have already learnt pretty quickly how to use the metro and how to ask for directions! Anyway. They gave us all a piece of paper that had the name of a place written on it and the metro station it was next to. We had to get the metro there and then ask a person for directions and meet others from our group at the place. A bit of a silly exercise because there were signs for everything everywhere and it was obvious that groups of us were all going to the same place so we just went there together and followed the signs! A bit pointless but better than being in class.

Today I have had a breakthrough in my struggle with Russian though! A little old lady asked me for directions to the chemist and not only did I understand her but I also gave her the correct directions!!!! She said thank you to me, commented on my ‘funny accent’ and then gave me a hug! I was so proud of myself! Maybe I am actually going to get better at this language…

Church: Russkii style.

So I went to church with Vika yesterday. Before we got there I was so scared it was going to be some crazy Russian orthodox church where I would have to go to confession and cover my head (I’d put a scarf in my bag just in case!) Fortunately it turned out to be a Baptist church. Less scary, but still very different to my church. It was really traditional – we had to stand up whenever someone read from the bible, prayed, moved… I noticed that of course there were no women in positions of leadership – I wonder what they would have thought if I’d told them that I was on the leadership team of a church in England? Probably that England was a very crazy country!

Of course I didn’t understand anything that the pastor said and I didn’t know any of the songs. So I think Vika was a bit worried I was bored. But I wasn’t, I was fascinated by the people there. I looked around the church and realised me and Vika were the youngest there by a long way! I can see why this kind of church doesn’t appeal at all to young people. We sung two very traditional songs, then listened to a choir and then we had to listen to not one but TWO sermons. I can’t keep attention for longer than 20mins on a sermon so it didn’t really matter that I didn’t understand it as I’m pretty sure I would’ve switched off after 20mins anyway! I’d really like to go and see if there are any more lively churches in Moscow with younger people there.

Behind the place the pastor stood (I don’t even know what this is called?! Clearly I don’t go to ‘traditional’ churches in the UK) was a huge stained glass window that said ‘Бог есть любов’ (God is Love). The fact that I understood this and could relate to it really moved me and I realised how I was worshipping God in such a different way and in such a different place, but it was still possible. He really is God of the whole world.

Day 3. Forgetting how to smile.

On Friday I had my first lesson at the school I will be studying at. We had to talk about ourselves, kind of like a ‘getting to know you’ session. My teacher is nice. Although she made us watch a video about ‘meeting new people on the street’. It was basically a video of a guy hitting on a girl in the street. Then she said our next lesson would be on the street. This is when I began to worry. WHAT was she gonna make us do? Fortunately she was just showing us around the area! I felt a bit more confident in my Russian afterwards because I did actually understand what was going on in my lesson. But then we were let loose out in the big, scary world of actual Russia again and I remembered I am not capable of doing ANYTHING.

Everyone keeps saying ‘don’t worry, your Russian is gonna improve so much this year!’ But at the moment I don’t see how. I guess it’s only the third day. Me and my friend are going to find out about an English Club. They are places where young people go to improve their English by talking to British people. Obviously we will speak English there but it will be such a good way to meet RUSSIAN young people. One major failing of my school is that it is a school for foreign people, so it’s quite hard to meet Russians. Having Russian friends will make my Russian a to the mazing. I hope.

The past few days have mostly been spent wandering around trying to find our way around Moscow. We’ve been to many shopping malls. But bought nothing as it is so ridiculously expensive. Boo. Red Square has been shut as tomorrow is ‘City day’ – the birthday of Moscow. There’s a huge party on Red Square but it’s been so frustrating not actually being able to go on it yet!

The biggest success of the past day is that I have found a supermarket near my school!!!! It was a happy day. I now have pasta SAUCE and cheese. An actual meal.

However I now have a new worry. Here it is: I still haven’t met the woman who will be my landlady. She’s on holiday and I have NO idea when she’s coming home. She’s blatantly just gonna walk in one day and I’m gonna have to make conversation with her. Then she’ll probably tell me off for putting stuff in the wrong place or something. :S And I need to pay her. But I dunno a.how much she’s gonna charge me and b.when I should give it to her. I know this should not be a worry. But I am so scared of when she comes back. What if she doesn’t like me? What if she gets annoyed that my Russian is so bad? There’s probably nothing to worry about. But I always need to worry about something and at the moment this is it.

Final thought of today. I am truly turning into a Muscovite as I have noticed I now have a ‘Russian face’ that I use on the metro. You know how on public transport in the UK if you catch someone’s eye you give them a grin, even if you don’t know them? That does NOT happen in Russia. Everyone looks at each other like they want to kill each other. And now I am doing it too. My smile is fading. It makes me sad. But also kinda makes me giggle at how quickly I am turning into a Russian!!

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Just after I wrote all this Vika my flatmate came home. We sat and chatted in the kitchen with her friend Zoya for 2 hours. It made me feel a LOT better about my ability in Russian and about living in this flat. Even if my landlady is scary at least I have a friend here! She and her friend are Christians (as is my landlady – there are huge pictures of Jesus EVERYWHERE in our flat, kinda scary.) and they invited me to church tomorrow! Am a bit worried I may have to go to confession in Russian but other than that I’m excited to see what a Russian church is like! Apparently I need to wear a dress. Clearly it is going to be very different to the churches I go to!

God is looking after me. Everything’s gonna be alright.

The day of the Tomato Paste Pasta

I made it!!! YayYayYay!! The journey was ok. Apart from the fact that they played ‘17 Again’ on the plane. Potentially the worst film ever made. But I survived it.

When I got to the airport my friend Sasha who works for Love Russia picked me up from the airport and took me to my flat. I felt a bit bad because I was so unbelievably tired (4 hours sleep) and still felt pretty gross from all the travelling that I wasn’t really talking much. He put the radio on. I think he sensed my uncommunicativeness (is that a word? if not I christen it a word).

It took about 50 minutes to get to my flat – the airport is nowhere near ANYTHING in Moscow. I made Sasha go and ask upstairs for the key, fortunately they had it. I was stressing that they wouldn’t be in and I’d have to wait for my flatmate to get home 2 hours later :-/

My flat is cool. More Russian than the last one – I have a rug on my wall. My room is big, bigger than any I’ve ever had at uni. Everything in the flat seems to be a little bit broken, so there is a trick to working everything. I like that. Once I’ve got it all down it'll be grand.

I live near Ploshad Illicha metro – if anyone wants to stalk me on google earth. It’s a good location – only about 4 stops from my school and 40 mins walk to Red Square. Pretty sweeeeeeeeeeet.

My biggest stress last night was that I couldn’t get the internet to work. Gah. But after a quick skype chat with the girl who lived here last year we got it sorted :)

Today I’ve been into the school where I will be studying. We had a TEST. I’m pretty sure I failed it. Epicly. Half of it was a speaking test and I didn’t understand the first question they asked me. Not a good start. I’ve totally forgotten all my Russian :( When I came in the summer I was mainly with people who can’t speak Russian so I felt like mine wasn’t so bad. Now I’m surrounded by people who are actually really good at it and I’ve remembered just how bad mine is. That got me down a bit today. I remembered that I am going to spend the majority of this year being laughed at/feeling stupid. Sigh.

Ah well. I went to Red Square with Anabelle and Sana (two friends from Birmingham uni) in the afternoon. That was cool. It’s cool that I can visit Red Square every day. Very cool.

The biggest worry of my day has been the dreaded FOOD SHOPPING. Yesterday I forgot that I would need to somehow feed myself and so had no food. I made do with the biscuits I had bought in England and just skipped breakfast this morning. But on the way home food shopping had to be done… or I would have to have more biscuits for dinner. I got the metro home (an adventure in itself as I got lost – to get to the metro station I need you have to walk through from another station. I did not know this and got VERY lost) and began to look for a shop. I couldn’t find one so just went to a fruit stall and bought some bananas and apples. After deciding this would have to be my dinner I finally saw a little corner shop! Success! Almost. Now the thing about corner shops in Russia is that everything is behind a counter. I had forgotten this and when I walked in was shouted at by a quite scary Russian woman. After realising she was just asking me what I wanted I just said pasta and then pointed at something that looked tomato sauce like. It was tomato paste. And not nice. So tonight I had a dinner of pasta and tomato paste. It was not nice.

And tomorrow is yet another adventure… in which I need to find a hairdryer…

3 hours until I exit The Hudd.

So, in 3 hours I will begin my Russian adventure. My dad’s driving me down to Heathrow for a lovely early 9.30am flight. Urgh. We have to set off at 2am. Mega urgh. I’m not even going to attempt to sleep.

Over the past few days I have been asked the question ‘How are you feeling?’ followed quickly by ‘Are you scared?’ A LOT. This makes me think I should be scared, but for some miraculous reason I am not. Yes I’m nervous but I wouldn’t say how I’m feeling is scared. I’ve just got that nervous ‘new thing’ feeling, not that ‘I am so scared I am going to vomit’ feeling. This, I see, as a positive.

Naturally I have a few worries. These are all obviously ridiculous, but I shall share them with you all anyway...

1. What if the person at the check in desk will not let me on the plane with my bag that is 2kg too heavy? (no matter how many times I re-packed I could NOT shift that 2kg!)

2. What if I have for some unknown reason brought the wrong plane ticket, or the wrong piece of paper and they will not let me on the plane?

3. What if my friend in Moscow forgets to pick me up at the airport?

4. What if the neighbour who has the keys for my flat is not in and I am stranded outside my flat? (My landlady is not in Moscow for the first week I am there, so I have to ask the neighbour for the key – clearly I will make my friend who is giving me a lift there do that)

And

5. What if I can’t get the internet to work? How will I ever get to FACEBOOK?

So those are my worries. All pretty silly. Right now instead of sleep I’m gonna spend my last couple of hours in the UK on facebook. Woop.

Goodbye dear Huddersfield, how I will miss it!

Next blog coming at yer from Moskva!!!!